Each day brings me closer to the inevitable. The feeling is indescribable.
Shock? Yes, that. But something else too.
Not numb. That would probably be welcome.
Not really flat either. I felt that after Fred died and this isn’t it.
It’s a sort of fear; panic. But it’s without movement.
It’s immobile. But not the frozen deer in the headlights thing.
Perhaps it’s like the feeling a fleeing zebra might have, at that very moment when the lion clips its heel.